I am amazed at this experience of life I'm living right now....and right now is all that matters(although when I think of the future, it only excites me and takes me away from my center). After the filth I witnessed in Varanasi and after spending 4 longest hours of my life on the train station in Varanasi waiting for the ever elusive train to take me to Delhi, I was ready to right India off forever. At the train station between the hours of midnight and 4 am, I saw the worst India has to offer....the homeless children, the hungry wolf like men waiting to pounce on the homeless girls, diseased and rotting animals, huge and very well fed rats running around in the kitchen of a restaurant!!!! I couldn't understand why anyone bothers to come visit India and I really couldn't see anything spiritual and holy in all this shit.

A long train ride brought us to the city of Rishikesh. It's a quaint little city of ashrams and temples along the banks of the holy river Ganga and nestled between the holy majestic Himalayas. I can't say it was love at first sight but now I can safely say that I've hit jackpot with this city. Not a day goes by when I don't meet some random person that truly enhances my life. Rishikesh literally means city of Rishis (wise sage). All through the history of India, sages have meditated along the Ganga in this city. THe city vibrates at a different frequency. There is so much peace here in the chaos of India. I've met a beautiful woman here, who's been living with an Indian guru for over 20 years. She's a truly enlightened soul and she's really helped me open my heart. I've met a 25 year old beautiful guy here who has completely blown me away with his wisdom. Another truly enlightened soul! He's a great astrologer, the best I've ever met.

My beloved Eran, who is now called Joe, was with me on this journey. He's left for Israel a couple of days ago and I'm supposed to meet with him there in a 5 days. But this astrologer guy, Anand, has invited me to join this vedic teaching group he's holding next week. So now, looks like plans will have to be changed. This is how beautifully life is flowing for me right now. Existence keeps bringing gems into my life and I'm open to receiving it. The more I receive, the more I get. I am just awed by the beauty of life and the selflessness of this divine existence that keeps showering these gifts on me. I neither deserve them nor do I work for them, but they keep coming my way. My heart is overflowing with gratitude. THank you, thank you , thank you

WOW! My last post was almost 5 months ago. A lot has happened in the last 5 months, both in the spiritual world and my physical world. I am not much into sharing my inner journey any more. It's becoming more and more personal and intense and I feel that sharing such experiences tend to leak my energy. Just want you guys to know that i am happier and stronger than I've ever been before. I still have no idea where life is going but I truly believe it's flowing in the right direction. In the meantime, I've found myself a lovely partner to flow along with me. Eran has wrapped up his life in Israel and now we are on this journey together. I have to admit that I had really come to enjoy being alone without feeling the need to be constantly with someone, friends or family or boyfriends. WHen I truly started to enjoy my aloneness, this beautiful man came into my life. I truly love him a lot and we have a really intense and wonderful time together. So, now i have left the ashram and am on the travelling circuit in India again. This also means I'll be writing my blog more often and adding more pics. I do have a link to my blog on my facebook in case you want to read about my whereabouts.

So, currently i am in Varanasi aka the city of death. It's a holy city for Hindus and they believe that if they are cremated in Varanasi, then they will get out of the cycle of life and death. The city is built along the banks of the river Ganga, which is the holiest river in India. ONe can safely say that it is also one of the dirtiest rivers in the country. The belief is that if you come and take a dip in the Ganga three times, then all your karma is washed away (at the same time you get covered with a gazillion tons of lethal bacteria most of it from fecal matter as all the city's sewage is dumped directly into the river).

The thing to do in Varanasi is to go along the seawall by the river Ganges and enjoy the sights. Except it's unlike any seawall you've walked along. In Vancouver, you would see people roller blading, biking, running, at the most you'll see a bum or two doing something out of the ordinary. Varanasi is a bit different. I saw baba's (indian sages) meditating under peepal (indian variety of a tree) tree, people swimming in the river while a dead body is being cremated on the shore, people playing cricket as another dead body is being carried to its funeral, dogs, goats, cows, buffalos, shitting everywhere. Little kids and puppies all fighting over the same food in the garbage, all shitting in the same places, all being ignored the same way by their mothers. Not much difference between animals and humans here at all. Children swimming in the river as a dead cow floats by. People washing there clothes, and the professional launderers at work. People shitting everywhere, men with barely any clothes on, scratching there balls, peeing where people are walking, men hacking and spitting just inches away from you. You have to be constantly watchful of where you are stepping, not just that you might step in a pile of fresh shit, but also because I almost stepped on a human skull!!!

Finally, we arrived at the place where there is a body being cremated around the clock for centuries. THis particular ghat is the most auspicious place to be burned. I have never seen death taken so lightly before. While one pyre is being lit, there are about 3 other dead bodies being readied for the funeral. There is a certain sweet smell in the air and ofcourse a lot of smoke. I saw a body being burned but it's feet were sticking out from under the wood. One of the guys in charge came with a stick and just shoved the feet inside with a stick. It is so bizzare the way they are so out of touch with reality. Or it makes me think am i the one who is out of touch with reality. To see death this up close and personal, one is almost forced to live. Really live in the now and here. The energy is so intense in this place that this deep silence just descends on you. It's really hard to talk and really there is nothing to talk about. It's hard to eat or drink anything coz I feel like there are dead people everywhere. It's like I would be getting there energy inside me if I eat. I feel like I can see auras everywhere but at the same time it's not unsettling. SOmething very calming and quiet about it.

Well I've had a fill of this city and i think it's time to move on. Now, I'll be moving on to the Himalayas to the city of the source of Ganga. Hopefully Ganga there is a bit cleaner than the one I've seen so far. I'll be travelling for a month or so in India and then me and Eran are thinking of going to Israel. After Israel, it'll be off to Europe where we are just gonna rent an RV and drive around until we find a place to make our home. SO far we are thinking some place in the south of Spain but who knows!?!! BUt I am ready to have a home base now. I am looking forward to sharing my life with a beautiful partner and creating a home together. I'll keep you posted.

Well, I was going to write about the adventures of Crazy, Guava and Sponge in London but I couldn't do it justice like Crazy did. So if you wanna know what happened to me in London, please click on the link below.

http://crazyschronicles.blogspot.com/2007/09/well-it-looks-as-though-i-left-off-on.html

With a very very very heavy heart I bid goodbye to Israel.

What a lovely 5 weeks I've had. All my life I had so many illusions about Israel...not a country I wanted to visit. I have collected so many beautiful memories of so many beautiful places and lovely people with open hearts and not such "jewish" habits!

Highlights of my trip:

Watching the sunset over the desert and the color of the red Jordan mountains.
Camping out on the beach on the shores of the Red Sea
Getting swept off my feet in the Dead Sea
Visiting Golan Heights and seeing the beauty of nature destroyed by war
Attending a typical Jewish wedding


Weird things that only happen in Israel:

Watch out for freshly shaven men on a local bus....most likely they are suicide bombers
Have your bags checked at the entrance of every mall, every restaurant, every public area
Be asked if you are carrying a weapon as you enter a movie theatre
See kids walking around with M16's on a beach

Funniest phrase I learned in Israel:

Instead of saying I don't give a damn...you say, "It doesn't even interest my left ball"

What a lovely experience I had. The lovely evenings spent with Eran on the terrace talking about god only knows what but seems like the two of us never run out of stuff to talk about. The walks on the beach, the fights, the making up, the love...so much unconditional love! The time spent meditating together, the weird experiences that Eran helped me through. I can't believe he still loves after seeing me go through some of the insane stuff that I went through. I cannot imagine loving someone so much and so unconditionally. So I spent 5 weeks with him...but no conditions on what happens in the future. Lovely to not want to cage the other and keep them for yourself. Because he doesn't try to cage me, I want to be in his life...because I choose to....and vice versa! We are going to meet again in Goa in a couple of months. Looks like Goa might become home for a while. Not too shabby...get a little cottage right on the beach...meditate, do yoga, read, chill out! Not a bad life! There has been a little talk of starting an orphanage in Goa but who knows. I am just flowing at the moment.

Next stop....LONDON! Can't wait to meet my beautiful gals in London. Party time begins tonite. A week in London and then let's see....choices are Paris or India! I'll keep you posted!

Lots of love and kisses

Med sea to Dead sea to Red Sea




After a lovely breakfast with Nir and Dana (Eran's lovely friends) we left our apartment on the banks of med(iterranean) sea enroute to Dead sea. Dead sea is so crazy. It is lower than sea level -400 meters. How strange is that. Also, it is the saltiest sea in the world. So, we arrived at the there at around 6 pm. Spent the evening hanging out with one of Eran's friends house in a quibbutz by the sea. The night, we spent on a cliff looking down at the Dead sea. It was beautiful. We set up our tent, got the firing going. Eran's friend gave us a bottle of wine which we thoroughly enjoyed. It was a beautiful evening...one I will remember forever as one of the strangest places I slept in. Oh did I tell you, we were a stone's throw away from an army base? Well, it's really hard to find a secluded spot in Israel coz you can be pretty sure that the army found it as well.



Next morning, we went to a spa on the shores of the Dead Sea. I walked into the sea and it bloody swept me off my feet....literally. It's so salty that it is almost impossible to stand in it. The water is so dense that it kicks you off your feet and makes you float. And the water feels like oil ...very disgusting. But it's really good for the skin so I hung in there. After the sea, we took a mud bath and then to sulfur springs. By the end of it all, my skin was very soft, smooth and glowing. After the relaxing afternoon, we started our journey to the Red Sea.

















2 hours later, through the dry, barren, beautiful desert, we arrived in Eilat on the banks of Red Sea. The city is like Vegas, with big hotels, and very touristy. I wanted to spend a night on the beach as I had never slept on the beach. So, Eran was kind enough to oblige and after spending a lovely evening exploring the city, we pitched a tent on the beach. It was yet another beautiful night, sleeping under the stars, with waves crashing literally a few feet away from you. Woke up the sun and had a lovely early morning swim in the Red Sea. Spent some time just hanging out, meditating, on the beach and then headed off to the Sheraton hotel. This is where we were going to spend the next night. It's nice to clean up in a nice hotel after living like vagabonds for a couple of days. The hotel was really beautiful...Vegas style...huge, with 5 swimming pools, lots of bars minus the casinos ofcourse.



The next day, we drove through the desert, checked out the beduoin villages along the way and ended up at the Desert Ashram. There is a lovely Osho ashram in the middle of the desert, surrounded on three sides by firing zones. Firing zones are areas that are used by the army for target practice. It was the most surreal thing to see. We decided to stay a night in the ashram. This ashram is more like a commune that Osho had envisioned. About 20 people, all in their mid thirties, live in this ashram as one big family. They have one kitchen and dining hall where they take turns cooking. They have meditations during the day and also invite therapists to hold groups every so often. We were lucky enough to arrive there on a friday, which is the Sabbath friday. They prepared a special meal and before the meal, there was singing. People brought their guitars, sitars, drums and sang songs of peace and love...all the time surrounded by firing zones. Fuckin' crazy! I love these people...they are tired of all the war and shit and have created their own little piece of heaven.

So, we are back in Tel Aviv now. The sun is about to set so it will get cool enough to go for a run. I've been running along the beach any chance I get. It's really quite nice in the evening. I feel really at home here. Life is very simple and enriching. I love Eran and cherish every minute I spend with him. We have a lot of fun together. The funniest is our fights...when I am really angry at him, I yell at him in hindi and he yells back at me in Hebrew. We get all the shit out and it always makes us laugh. I love to meditate with him, I love our talks, our walks, our shooting the shit, our differences, our similarities. I still have another 3 weeks to spend with him. After that...who the hell knows !!!!

The Big Fat Jewish Wedding


Me and Eran got up early on thursday and started our long journey (2 hours) to Eran's parent's house in the North. Apparently 2 hours is considered a very long drive according to Israeli standards. I understand that now having travelled from the northern most point to the southern most tip of Israel. It takes 6 hours to go across the country. Considering what a small country Israel is, it is very geographically diverse and it is surrounded on all sides by, putting it lightly, not so friendly neighbours. Jordan runs alongside pretty much the entire length of Israel, and in the north are the lovely Lebanese and Syrian neighbours. In the south, Israel shares its border with chums like Egypt and Saudi Arabia is just a stone's throw away.

So, we drove to Golan Heights where Eran is from. His parents live in a Mushaf...it is like a Quibbutz but a bit more modern idea and works a bit better. For those of you who don't know what a quibbutz is, here's a short lesson. A bunch of people live together in a little community where they all work together and all the money goes to the joint fund in the quibbutz. Then the joint fund divides the money equally among the members living in the community. Kids don't live with their parents but are raised in a communal nursery. The idea was nice but didn't work. So, in a Mushaf people live together in a community, and all do their own work and earn their own money. But they live like a big tight-knit family.

Needless to say I was a bit scared to go to his hometown...coz the whole bloody community (about 80 families) is his family. But the fear was completely baseless as they welcomed me with open arms. His dad especially is a beautiful person with a very warm heart. He made me feel really welcome...making delicious treats for us to eat. Very warm and loving family. I met his brothers and other friends. The day after we arrived there was his brother's wedding. What a gorgeous setting. If, under the influence of drugs or under a fit of insanity, I ever decide to get married again, I would like to do it the way they did it. The setting was a lovely rustic restaurant on the edge of a cliff overlooking a beautiful valley and Golan heights. They had cushions on the floor for seating with low tables. There were hammocks everywhere, a live band playing some beautiful hebrew and arabic tunes.

The ceremony itself lasted for maybe 10 minutes and was beautiful. After the ceremony, we all ate and the dancing began around 4 pm. Then we danced with the older people until around 6 pm and the real partying started after the oldies left. Great music, lots of booze and the green stuff, and pretty soon it was looking like a trance party in Goa. We danced till about 1 in the morning and then everyone just passed out outside. Next morning there was a lovely breakfast and the usual funny drunken stories from the night before. Very fun! It was one big stress free wedding party.

After the party split, Eran took me for a little sightseeing tour. Beautiful Golan heights....miles and miles of beautiful barren land with the highest concentration of mine fields per square meter in the world. All the sights he showed me had a war story behind it. We drove to Mt. Hermon which is the highest point in Israel. There are checkpoints all over the place as this is close to the border with Syria and Lebanon. At the top of the mountain there was an army bunker. It's really surreal to see that. In Canada you go to a top of the mountain, you see a lighthouse welcoming the ships to the harbour. Here you go to the top and there is an army bunker. Shootout points that look directly into Syria. Underground hiding places for war times. Very sad. Eran said that seeing these places through my eyes has given him a completely different perspective. He was shocked at how many war stories he told me and made him realize that growing up how much of the dinner table conversation was about war!

The next day, he took me to see his dad's farms. Avocado, grapefruit, pomegranate and my favorite mango trees. We went on an ATV, which Eran drives like a maniac. It's nice to see this side of the calm, meditative Eran. He can be quite a rough, tough farm boy. Very nice ;) I like! We picked mangoes off the trees, got covered by mango juice, delicious, delicious, delicious!

Got back home to Tel Aviv for a day to do our laundry before setting off to the south of Israel.

Happy Birthday to me :)

Thanks a lot for the lovely wishes from all of you lovely people. It was so wonderful to open my email account and have it flooded with love from you all. I feel very loved...both on hotmail and facebook :) So, here is my story now...

I arrived in Italy in the most roundabout way as possible. 5 countries and 24 hours later, I arrived in Florence to find myself in a rainy and cold night. Needless to say I was more than a little disappointed coz the optimist in me hadn't even allowed me to pack a fleece thinking Italy in august had to be hot! The taxi driver took me to the ashram and showed me my residence....a nice little tent that I was to share with another girl. It was windy, rainy, cold, and pitch dark. He put my suitcase in the tent, gave me a hug and off he went. I was left feeling real sorry for myself...with questions like "what the fuck am I doing here","why did I leave the luxury of a warm bed", "why can't I be normal and live like normal people" and blah blah blah. I even called Eran to tell him that I might just come to Israel earlier than I had planned coz I didn't like Italy. That feeling lasted for...oh, 1 day. I had the best time of my life after the initial panic. I joined a group which was beautiful...dancing, a lot of meditation, a lot of love. Every evening was some sort of a party and there were some really beautiful people from all over Europe. We had beautiful concerts by Prem Joshua and some new band from Chile. There was a lot of dancing and I even met a beautiful Italian man. He took me on his motorcycle to the lovely city of Sienna. It was the most beautiful drive ever, through the rolling hills of Tuscany. Everywhere you looked, you could see vineyards, castles, quaint little Italian villages. Thanks Gabrielle for showing me such a good time. I will remember the Toscana sunset for ever!

Saying goodbye to the ashram was as usual very hard. It felt like I was leaving home, my family. But, I go back in June again so it's all good and plus I was really looking forward to seeing beautiful Eran. I arrived in Tel Aviv at 4 am local time. I was surprised to see a very modern airport and not too much security. I was expecting army people with machine guns everywhere...but it was relatively normal. Eran was there waiting for me. It was lovely to see him again...such a beautiful man he is!!! We spent the night at his brother's apartment. Next morning, we decided to go to Jerusalem. So I spent my 34th birthday in the holy city of Jerusalem. Tel Aviv is beautiful from what I've seen so far...kind of a mix of Rio and New York. The beaches are beautiful and the night life is an all night affair. We've rented an apartment right in the middle of the city, 5 mins from the beach and 5 mins from the East Village kind of ambience. It's a studio apartment but has a large terrace overlooking the sea.

Jerusalem was interesting....far from what I'd expected. Such a strange mix of old and new. Not just old...5000 years old!! You enter the old city and it's like going back in the past. People live like they did 5000 years ago. People wear black and are obviously very religious. I went to visit the place that is the root cause of all the wars in the western world right now...THE WALL!!! That's all it is really ....a mere wall called the "Cotel" where all the orthodox Jews come to pray. Just behind the wall is the Muslim mosque and the most sacred place for Muslims coz they believe that Mohammad rose to heaven from there. So, now they pray right next to each other, hating each other. The hatred and tension between these two cultures is palpable in this area. There is so much fuel and anger and hatred that a tiny little spark can just cause everything to go up in flames any minute!

You step out of the old city and you are right in the middle of a modern 21st century fun-loving city. There are streets lined with bars, cafes, night clubs. There is no particular closing time for these bars...i heard it starts to wind down as the sun comes up. Me and Eran had a great time, sipping on some Israeli wine, chatting and catching up in one of the lovely wine bars in the area. After spending 3 days in Jerusalem, we've arrived in Tel Aviv today. I am going out with a lovely Israeli friend I met in Italy. Looking forward to seeing her again.

So far I am really surprised at the Israel I've seen. People are really friendly, welcoming and fun-loving. Thank God I met Eran or I would've missed out on visiting such a beautiful and rich country.

And let the next adventure begin…..


The time has come to bid farewell to the beautiful city of Vancouver. I arrived here, with much reservations, on July 3rd. I had very good reasons to be a little hesitant about coming to Vancouver. The city had been the source of a lot of pain and heartache over the last 7 years. I felt like I was ready to take my new tools that I had learned for a test drive.

The second day of being in the city, I ran into the first reason I didn’t wanna come to Vancouver…Rick! I thought I had dealt with all the issues relating to him but it was important to see how it would feel to see him again. I saw him at Whiterock and we waved at each other. It was the wave that one gives to an acquaintance that one used to know a long time ago but have no interest in stopping to chat with. The first battle was won!

Second battle was going to my apartment downtown. There were so many memories of Ashley everywhere downtown that I thought it would be hard and painful to revisit those places. After the initial sadness that didn’t linger for more than a day or so, I was quiet happy to rediscover Vancouver.

And rediscover Vancouver I did! I lived with my parents for the entire month without any major disagreements. It was not something I was looking forward to as I hadn’t lived with them since I was 21 years old. Not just that, I wasn’t sure how they would react to the new me. It took them sometime to digest the fact that I was genuinely happy being on my own and traveling. They had prepared themselves to come as saviors to protect their little girl from the evil world. They could not fathom how it was possible for me to be so happy. So, after the initial denial, they started asking me questions about what makes me the way I am. They showed genuine interest and who knows maybe I’ve influenced them enough that they might just pay their little girl a visit in the maroon world J

Besides that, I’ve enjoyed Vancouver this time more than I ever had. It is truly one of the most beautiful cities I’ve even visited. I reconnected with people I hadn’t been in touch with for ages, I partied at the “golden triangle” with Shannon and Harp, I went sailing with Rosemary and the gang, I watched the fireworks from my favorite patio in the city at Lsquared, I had a drunken fest at my apartment downtown, but most importantly, I fell in love with my favorite massage therapist all over again. Thanks Glenn for making my trip so memorable and for making our time together so magical. I really look forward to seeing you soon in India.

After being nourished to the max by all the love that has been showered over me by all of you guys, I feel like I’m ready again to face the unknown world. My next adventure kicks off in Italy. I am going back to the ashram in Italy for 10 days for the annual Miasto festival. It’s going to be one big party and there’s apparently going to be thousands of people from all over Europe coming to this thing. I am really looking forward to being in the ashram energy again. I did meditate while at home everyday, but the collective meditation takes you to a whole different energy level. Then from Italy, I head on over to meet my beautiful Eran. Eran has been insisting that I spend my birthday with him this year and has invited me to his brother’s wedding. If anyone had asked me last year where I would be on my next birthday, I don’t think that Israel would’ve been my answer in my wildest dreams. But now I am going to turn 34 in Israel and I’m going to attend a traditional jewish wedding in a little Israeli village! From Israel, I will be heading off to London to meet my lovely darlings from my South American dream vacation…Crazy, Spongy, Maharani and Kirsty….all in London together again!

So again, thank you everyone for making my time in Vancouver so memorable. You all have given me so many more reasons to call this city home.